It’s A Complicated World

Why do individuals tend to make things so f*&$ing complicated? The reality is there is no right or wrong answer for things. We just do it. While analyzing the song “Complicated” of Avril Lavigne, we noticed there is a clear resemblance of day to day relationships between human beings. We kinda/sorta have certain perceptions and expectations that, sometimes, are not met within our social groups. Here is where things start to get complicated…

In Lavigne’s song, she describes how her boyfriend tries to pretend to be someone he’s not. The idea of a social criteria has been established through relationships.  Under this criteria, The Social Identity Theory establishes that people need to feel a sense of belonging in a group.  “But you become Somebody else ‘Round everyone else”. He changes all of his individual characteristics to fit into a social group. Through the song she tries to explain to him that she accepts him the way he is and that her perception is that he looks like a “fool” when he tries to act differently. She expects he can change his behavior, though it does not go in sync with society, to find his own self.

Another theory that relates to the song is the Communication Theory of Identity in the part that she demands to “Take off all your preppy clothes”. This could be associated with the communal aspects where the images are tied to the groups that he is trying to be part of. Who is preppy, punk or nerd? These are ideas that have been created to segregate us within different groups. Therefore, our paradigm is sacrifice by the choices we take. To a certain point, it constructs a problem within their own relationship due to the self-presentation he wants to portray to others. “I like the way you are”  this way she reminds him who he really is when they are together.  

In modern day, the circumstances are WAY more complicated! Thanks to our interaction through CMC (Computer-Mediated Communication), relationships have become dependent with computer mediated mediums such as e-mail, text, internet, Facebook, Twitter, Skype and others. For some people this takes away from the ethics the real essence of the relationship. Some couples feel that it deprives the attraction between them and eventually creates conflict and repulsion. Because of unwanted circumstances such as distance, for others their only option to maintain a relationships is through CMC.

So why are things so complicated?! They just are…

Sources:

Guerrero, Laura K. Close encounters communication in relationships. 2nd ed. Thousand Oaks: Sage Publications, 2007. 21-59.